In the darkest of ahns it seems when at last there is a moment of peace. Its brief, like a whisper. Its enchanting to lose your self in such a moment and there breathe and be. Its not always there. At times we seek but yet do not see. We listen but we do not hear. Touch and never feel. How odd it is to go through this life without experiencing anything at all.
How at times in our lives we simple just exist and do not live. In order to survive... what must we do? More questions that seem yet again to not have an answer. Or perhaps the answer is right there before me and I refuse to see it.
We may never like what we hear, and yet we must listen to it. In turn must have realities we would rather not. To be come stronger in order to endure what lies ahead of us. How can we possibly do what we need to if we are closed off, you say no to life you are doing nothing but snuffing out the candle.
And yet when it comes to be you want to hide rather than fight, let go instead of stand your ground. I know I am guilty of such, letting go to avoid the pain of a far more crushing truth. To face the fact I could not be the one, that yet again someone came above me, before me, held something I could not. And yet now I stand, ready to fight, and wonder, Am I too late?
Has my time already passed. I feel like I am walking through the orchards of life with no candle, no moon light, no ray of the Lar Torvis to guide me. Nothing but raw instincts to lead me. And yet do they lead me astray or is that the minds own prison and limited notions that are holding me and keeping me back? Do I seek in vain?
Will there never be a single one answer that will lift the burdens from me? No I do not think so. And yet the challenges that are there before me, make me strive to become more to be more. To Master my own domain.
Standing on my own again, time will open windows and doors. I just have to have the open mind and heart to see them. It is never over until its over... perhaps somethings really can transcend time and space. I hope my will has the strength to endure what is to come. What ever it may be, it will be.
He asked me if Ard made me forget him, and there is not a moment of the day that I do not find my self either reminded of him or thinking of him. Missing him and hoping. Its foolish in many ways. But I cannot help it. You are not suppose to help who you love, the heart does not distinguish between it. You love who you love and if it be true its one thing that wont stop. No matter the lengths in which we go.
My tarnsman's talons hold my heart in a steel shod cage. For better or for worse. And until he releases it, I could never possibly give my self to another. And that alone leaves me at a dangerous edge. Reckless... precarious... and yet... dark and bleak. For one step one way or another could be a down fall. But some by virtue fall, some by sin rise. Which will be mine. Virtue or sin?
How at times in our lives we simple just exist and do not live. In order to survive... what must we do? More questions that seem yet again to not have an answer. Or perhaps the answer is right there before me and I refuse to see it.
We may never like what we hear, and yet we must listen to it. In turn must have realities we would rather not. To be come stronger in order to endure what lies ahead of us. How can we possibly do what we need to if we are closed off, you say no to life you are doing nothing but snuffing out the candle.
And yet when it comes to be you want to hide rather than fight, let go instead of stand your ground. I know I am guilty of such, letting go to avoid the pain of a far more crushing truth. To face the fact I could not be the one, that yet again someone came above me, before me, held something I could not. And yet now I stand, ready to fight, and wonder, Am I too late?
Has my time already passed. I feel like I am walking through the orchards of life with no candle, no moon light, no ray of the Lar Torvis to guide me. Nothing but raw instincts to lead me. And yet do they lead me astray or is that the minds own prison and limited notions that are holding me and keeping me back? Do I seek in vain?
Will there never be a single one answer that will lift the burdens from me? No I do not think so. And yet the challenges that are there before me, make me strive to become more to be more. To Master my own domain.
Standing on my own again, time will open windows and doors. I just have to have the open mind and heart to see them. It is never over until its over... perhaps somethings really can transcend time and space. I hope my will has the strength to endure what is to come. What ever it may be, it will be.
He asked me if Ard made me forget him, and there is not a moment of the day that I do not find my self either reminded of him or thinking of him. Missing him and hoping. Its foolish in many ways. But I cannot help it. You are not suppose to help who you love, the heart does not distinguish between it. You love who you love and if it be true its one thing that wont stop. No matter the lengths in which we go.
My tarnsman's talons hold my heart in a steel shod cage. For better or for worse. And until he releases it, I could never possibly give my self to another. And that alone leaves me at a dangerous edge. Reckless... precarious... and yet... dark and bleak. For one step one way or another could be a down fall. But some by virtue fall, some by sin rise. Which will be mine. Virtue or sin?
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