Sent on a mission for my home stone, for my caste, for the Ubar of Cos to aid a Jarl at an out post... but why does it feel as if I am being cast out from my home? Why is there that lurking sinking suspicion that something far more dark and dangerous lurks around the next corner?
I feel the cold hand of fate on the back of my neck and my stomach knots, my heart falters and panic sets in, my eyes are cold and empty, and yet full of emotions and fear. Returning to the out post that I had once taken safety within... where childhood friends reside and yet I am reluctant to go.
Tears swell and I know not the reasons why they fill my eyes, will the blurry vision be enough to allow me to see what is happening or will they be the mask to hide what is there, what is being done. I leave behind my island to serve her and her Ubar, to serve my caste. But my heart is there and I am not... behind me he is left and I feel alone. Broken for some reason.
There is something that is pulling and twisting, tugging and nagging. Why wont it release me...? Perhaps it is me that will not let go, perhaps it is I that holds onto something that is just a mist and fog of imagination.
Broken and shattered I feel as the waves under me rock the ship I am upon, I find no solace in the waves as I once did. Nightmares are ripped open, from my parents death to my still born daughter... the nightmares are so palpable that they are tearing me apart, causing real violent tears to take hold of me, the sobs shake me so hard. Never before have I been so emotionally raw and to the point where the emotions take hold and no longer does logic and reason reign, but chaos and insanity. They are the guiding beacon for me...
Shadows of the past dance through my mind like the taharian fires, the deep rooted and passionate emotions rise to the surface and in my furs I sit and scream to the skies in hopes for some kind of release. Some kind of answer or sign, something, anything to ease my suffering. To ease my troubled mind... my heart falters... something does not feel right about this trip.
Something does not sit well with me, here I am just ehns from the beaches of the out post and I do not know what will happen.... Jonas is here and yet I still fear... but what... WHAT... oh Odin grant me a shred of mercy, a shred of strength to brave what is before me...
The storm has never passed, and it might never past, but my ray of lar torvis has broken through, I pray that the fates will not let the storm take over again and shield out that ray of light. I cannot do this again, I cannot get over him yet again...
-tear drops splash the page, her hand shakes and she screams in agony and pain-
I am truly in a place I never expected to be in my life... Dance does my fears... Dance does the nightmares, dance does the love that I feel that now embraces me tenderly without words knowing how to soothe the hurt and calm the tempest when she rages... I miss him already...
I feel the cold hand of fate on the back of my neck and my stomach knots, my heart falters and panic sets in, my eyes are cold and empty, and yet full of emotions and fear. Returning to the out post that I had once taken safety within... where childhood friends reside and yet I am reluctant to go.
Tears swell and I know not the reasons why they fill my eyes, will the blurry vision be enough to allow me to see what is happening or will they be the mask to hide what is there, what is being done. I leave behind my island to serve her and her Ubar, to serve my caste. But my heart is there and I am not... behind me he is left and I feel alone. Broken for some reason.
There is something that is pulling and twisting, tugging and nagging. Why wont it release me...? Perhaps it is me that will not let go, perhaps it is I that holds onto something that is just a mist and fog of imagination.
Broken and shattered I feel as the waves under me rock the ship I am upon, I find no solace in the waves as I once did. Nightmares are ripped open, from my parents death to my still born daughter... the nightmares are so palpable that they are tearing me apart, causing real violent tears to take hold of me, the sobs shake me so hard. Never before have I been so emotionally raw and to the point where the emotions take hold and no longer does logic and reason reign, but chaos and insanity. They are the guiding beacon for me...
Shadows of the past dance through my mind like the taharian fires, the deep rooted and passionate emotions rise to the surface and in my furs I sit and scream to the skies in hopes for some kind of release. Some kind of answer or sign, something, anything to ease my suffering. To ease my troubled mind... my heart falters... something does not feel right about this trip.
Something does not sit well with me, here I am just ehns from the beaches of the out post and I do not know what will happen.... Jonas is here and yet I still fear... but what... WHAT... oh Odin grant me a shred of mercy, a shred of strength to brave what is before me...
The storm has never passed, and it might never past, but my ray of lar torvis has broken through, I pray that the fates will not let the storm take over again and shield out that ray of light. I cannot do this again, I cannot get over him yet again...
-tear drops splash the page, her hand shakes and she screams in agony and pain-
I am truly in a place I never expected to be in my life... Dance does my fears... Dance does the nightmares, dance does the love that I feel that now embraces me tenderly without words knowing how to soothe the hurt and calm the tempest when she rages... I miss him already...
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